Have you seen that Progresso Soup commercial where a couple has just finished cleaning out the garage after sending their last child off to college? It follows the usual course of Progresso commercials: A person exerts themselves then decides to have some soup to replenish. (I know after exhausting myself the first thing I always want is a nice hot bowl of flavored water.) They go to the kitchen, grab a can of Campbell's Soup, and begin warming it up only to have some smirking fool see it and berate them for eating a "children's soup." Some typical lines are "We're not kids anymore," or "What are you? Five?!"

        True to form, the husband goes inside, gets down some Campbell's Soup, and begins preparing it, only to have his wife come in and patronizingly say, "Honey, the kids are gone!"

        Yep, we adults eat Progresso.

        Despite seeing these commercials for years, it wasn't till this one that the true message came flying out at me. "What are you doing with that crap we feed the kids? Get down the good stuff!!"

        So, gentle reader, allow me to let you down easy with a little home truth: If you ate Campbell's Soup as a child -- your parents hate you.