The random thoughts of a genius...er...gene nash.
when Google attacks
Published on May 5, 2004 By Gene Nash In Humor

    Put the salve on as instructed, go in for your shots, and stay away from that one -- you'll be fine. Wait -- wrong "burning" question.

    After perusing my referrals, I decided to answer some of the questions which have gone unanswered by the articles which search engines inaccurately dumped people on.

"When does Lent end?" -- It's over. For future reference it ends at Easter. That should be easy enough, right?

"When does Lent start?" -- Wait for Mardi Gras (it's all over the news). Let the deprivation begin. Personally I like to give up celibacy for Lent. It rids me of that false piety and pride I have over being such a good boy and puts my focus back where it belongs -- on what a lascivious little heathen worm I really am.

Click here for more than you could possibly ever want to know about Lent.

"Where can I buy abortion pills?" -- While I don't approve of this, I'll try to answer the question. I can't speak for the rest of the world, but here in America you currently need to get a prescription. Then avoid taking your prescription to any pharmacy that puts little fish symbols in their Yellow Pages ads.

Information on lousy Realtors/real estate agents -- I can only recommend you contact Diamond del Rio Properties in Bullhead City, AZ. You will then experience everything that is bad, lousy, and dishonest about the real estate business. Then the next time you see anyone exhibiting any of their traits you'll know to run as fast and far as you can.

33 people have inquired about "milky way sluts" -- I'm clueless. Is a "milky way slut" something like a crack whore but they do it for Milky Way candy bars? I don't know anything about them or where to find them. If you obtain this information please forward it to me; I have a bag of fun-size cooling in the fridge.

Was Peter the first Pope? -- Personally, technically I would say no since Catholicism and the papacy did not exist at the time of Peter. It's hard to be the first of something that doesn't yet exist. However, Catholics do consider him the first Pope. They trace an unbroken chain of leadership from Peter to John Paul II. Supposedly Peter passed his church leadership on, then that one passed it on, etc. etc. So, to a Protestant like me, uh-uh. To a Catholic, yepper!

Someone was searching for a "slut teen blog" -- I resent that. I am not a teen!

    That's all for now. Keep those referrals and questions coming in. Got a "burning question" not covered here? Just ask it in the comments section and maybe I'll get around to it next time. (Just don't hold your breath... because I wouldn't want you to die or anything... and, really, how often do I write these things?) Till then!

    Your Answer Man,
    Gene Nash


Comments
No one has commented on this article. Be the first!