The random thoughts of a genius...er...gene nash.
Gene Nash's Articles
April 30, 2008 by Gene Nash

This blog has moved.

Please visit Gene Nash: The Blog at http://genenash.com/blog/

 

February 27, 2008 by Gene Nash
AP -- Columbus, Ohio

  In a shocking turn of events sure to once again churn an already tumultuous presidential race, leading Democratic candidate Barack Obama has accused rival Hillary Clinton of slandering his racial heritage. Obama claims the Clinton camp is behind the release of a photo secretly taken at a recent Obama family reunion. The photo portrays Senator Obama surrounded by family members.

 

  Barack Obama Loompa in turban, possibly taken in Somalia by Sasquatch

 

  "This is fear mongering of the worst sort," said the clearly outraged junior senator. "To make an issue of a man's race in this day and age is an outrage of the worst kind and should be dealt with in the harshest possible way. I trust the good people of Ohio and all of America to see through Senator Clinton's desperate tactics and do the right thing come next Tuesday by voting for real change instead of politics as usual."

 

Personally, I am shocked, shocked by this whole thing! How dare Obama slander the good name of Clinton by himself leaking this obviously staged photo so he could turn around and claim Hillary is evil. What an obvious and -- yes! -- desperate ploy! Dirty tricks at their worst. This just proves how much of a same-old-same-old political operator Mr. Change really is.

Pffft.

 

 

February 12, 2008 by Gene Nash
Just some random thoughts on the 2008 Grammy Awards.

I used to watch the Grammys every year when I was young, but I couldn't even guess the last time prior to Sunday that I watched them.

Does Prince have "a picture in the attic"? (For the terminally young: Dorian Grey reference.)

OMG! Alicia Keys is hot!

Host? We don't need no stinking host! (For the terminally young: Treasure of the Sierra Madre reference.)

Jason Bateman apparently is just learning to read. That Marlon Brando "di...
February 10, 2008 by Gene Nash
From TMZ:

R.I.P.
God Pages Nurse Vining to Heaven

Posted Feb 2nd 2008 12:45PM by TMZ Staff

Shell Kepler, who played nurse Amy Vining on "General Hospital" for more than 20 years, died yesterday in Portland, Ore. Paging Dr. Quartermaine!

According to the Medical Examiner's office, Kepler died of renal failure.

After her stint on "General Hospital" ended, Kepler moved to Portland and got involved in charity fundraising.

IMDb says she was 46, the M.E. says she was 49.


So few...
February 5, 2008 by Gene Nash
Before primary season went into full swing, we asked a few of the major candidates to tell us why they should be president. Here are their responses.


Hillary Clinton: I have a vagina.

Dennis Kucinich: When the aliens land and say "Take me to your leader" they'll feel more comfortable with someone who looks like them.

John McCain: It's time a Diapered-American ran the Oval Office.

Fred Thompson: I can destroy the Soviet Union and bring down that wall!

John Edwards: I can bring to...
January 31, 2008 by Gene Nash
Brit Brit (Spears, y'all!) is back in the padded room. (So to speak.)

Her new shrink and weird little friend Sam Lutfi, conspired with the police to grab her up and transport her to UCLA Medical Center on a 5150 forced commitment. (That means she's being temporarily involuntarily committed for psychiatric evaluation because she's a danger to herself or others.)

Here are some random quotes lifted from various "updates" at TMZ.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ Britney's psychiatrist got i...
January 31, 2008 by Gene Nash
Well, I'd better memorialize this while I still can.



My new personal all-time best ranking here on JU. Number 7. WooHoo. My previous best was around number 18.

One of my goals last year was to get into the top ten. I had this whole grand plan. Like most of my grand plans, it flopped miserably. Nonetheless, I made it. It might have taken till the next year, but I made it!



[Update: Just so there's no confusion, the picture is from mid-January, not the day I posted the article. I w...
December 30, 2007 by Gene Nash
Dear People of the Glowing Box,

I need help, people of the glowing box!

My people no feed me. All night. I asked and asked but he no feed me.

My people tricked me into box. He say, "Maybe there food in there. Check it out." I sniffed around. It sniffed like other cat. When my back in, my people shove in my tail and lock gate on me. I trapped in box! (Do you get sad trapped in glowing box, people of the glowing box?)

It okie trapped in box. (I no know what okie is but my people say so...
December 24, 2007 by Gene Nash
My website has an RSS reader installed which I use to rifle through the news. You know how you can tell reporters have the day off? This morning, 67% of the "top headlines" are from overseas (it's very important for Americans to know about Thailand's elections or a building collapse in Egypt), and the rest are of equally questionable value (unless you're really worried about Michelle Rodriguez spending the holidays behind bars -- shoulda been born with a silver spoon in your mouth, Michelle -- o...
December 24, 2007 by Gene Nash
One of the things I always hated most about Christmas, even as a child, came after all the hoopla. You get up, you run around, you open presents, you have breakfast, you play with presents -- it's not even noon. And there's not a blessed thing on TV!

Maybe you're one of those people who likes sitting in front of the boob tube all day watching football, or some equally moronic display of adrenaline and macho preening that makes even peacocks blush in shame. Not me. (And, by the way, the boob i...
December 20, 2007 by Gene Nash
If you thought eHarmony was a dubious proposition before, this may seal it for you. In an eHarmony Advice article titled "Overcoming Shyness," Dr. Neil Clark Warren's first piece of advice is... date your sister! (A cousin's okay, too, if you don't have a sister, or, you know, she won't put out.)

I'm not kidding. Really.

"This can be your cousin or your sister or your old friend--somebody that you like. I suggest you go right through the whole rigmarole--call for a date with this person, w...
December 18, 2007 by Gene Nash
Today marks four years since I signed up with JU and wrote my first article. Wow. Could it really have been four years already? Where does time go?

This is probably the longest I've managed to stay with any online community. My online relationships with some of you are beginning to rival the longest relationships I've had in real life. It's more than a little strange, and increasingly unfamiliar to me, to "know" people so long.

I've started and not finished two different anniversary articl...
December 14, 2007 by Gene Nash
I used to be a card giving fool. Birthdays, Christmas, Thank You's, "Just Because" -- I had it covered. I kept a store of cards ready and waiting.

For years, my father's brothers and sisters (there are, like, seven of them) sent our family Christmas cards, but we never sent any in return. Every year, seven or eight cards would come in, family to family.

I always felt bad that we didn't reciprocate. I always felt bad that every year these people made the effort to send us greetings and we n...
December 13, 2007 by Gene Nash
clicking, clicking, clicking
site one, site two, site three
site two, site three, site one
whirling past like trees glimpsed from a merry-go-round
stuttering by again and again
maybe there's something new, click
maybe someone responded, click
maybe someone remembered me, click
site three, site one, site two
December 11, 2007 by Gene Nash
The latest piece of electronics to go down around here is my cordless telephone/digital answering machine. What the...?! That's, what, the seventh thing to burn out or break around here since the end of August?

* The Cooler (Yet again. I managed to get the motor running and milked it along for one last Summer, but that's it. I'm tired of messing with the bloody thing!)
* The Hard Drive (CRASH!)
* The Car Battery
* The Computer Monitor
* (Plus a couple other things I'm having a brain fart ...