Some things just make you feel old. Some things just walk up, slap you in the face, scream, "You thought you were still young?!" and start having a hearty laugh at your expense.

From my conversations with people, I get the impression that most people see themselves as a certain fixed age in the past. "I still feel 21," someone will say. Their current chronological age is a forgotten inconvenience.

Then something happens and your real age comes flying up into your consciousness. "Hi ya, pally! You might have forgotten me, but I sure haven't forgotten you!"¹ Your body refuses to do something you could previously do with ease. You discover a high school friend is married and has multiple children, some as old as when you originally met. Or in my case...

My mother applied for Social Security today.

That's a hard one to ignore. It doesn't matter that people still mistake me for being in my late teens or early 20s.² It doesn't matter that people keep mistaking my mother for being in her 30s. It doesn't matter that I'd like to forget I was born under the Nixon presidency.³ When your mother starts getting Social Security, you just can't ignore the smirking numeral waving at you from the corner.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go price those "mobility scooter" thingees. I may need one soon.

Yours,
Gene Nash

1. Apparently my chronological age talks like Frank Sinatra.
2. They obviously need glasses. I can't even convince myself I look that young anymore.
3. Is what President you were born under an American equivalent to the Chinese being born under the Year of the Dog/Dragon/Monkey etc.? I'm screwed.

Hehehe, and you thought I forgot how to use footnotes.