Martha's Apprentice

accept some substitutes

Published on September 28, 2005 By Gene Nash In Movies & TV & Books

Martha Stewart's version of The Apprentice premiered last Wednesday to extremely disappointing ratings.

Having two Apprentices on at once is stupid and suicidal. It can only harm the franchise. Since Trump had said he would only do two more iterations (meaning one beyond the current), they should have interleaved the versions, extending Trump's version into the next television season, and building momentum for a post-Trump continuation of the show. Instead, Martha is put in the impossible position of competing with Trump instead of complimenting him, as each week the differences are blatantly displayed.

It's still The Apprentice, for the most part. Instead of a New York high-rise, the contestants live at Martha Stewart's company. Instead of "You're fired," we hear "You don't fit in." (And I thought she was going with "You're shanked in the shower, biatch!" Oh well.) The nepotism of Martha placing her own daughter in the Caroline position, and her "George" constantly fingering his cigar like Linus romancing his blanket are both turn-offs. And the show now concludes -- rather cheesily -- with Martha writing the rejected candidate a formal letter of solace, rather than Trump and his cronies gloating over what a good kill they just made.

The biggest changes have to do with Martha's personality as opposed to Trump's. Trump is magnetic, his intense personality carries across the airwaves, smacks you in the face, and says, "Pay attention to me. I'm someone important." Martha, not so much. In the first episode, she was almost... demure. After her "corporate partner" judges announced they'd made a decision, she looked toward the male and asked, "Should would call them in now?"* as if she didn't know what to do next and was looking for direction.

Also, Martha's looking for a team player, not the more take charge leader Trump prefers. More than anything else, not appreciating that difference is what cost the first ejected player his position. The contestants are playing Apprentice, all right, but so far they are playing Trump's Apprentice. Martha's looking for something different. Until they comprehend that fact, the contestants are working against themselves.

As strong as she is, Martha comes off like the softer-side of Trump. It's too easy to call it a male/female thing; it's probably just a personality thing. Not only is she less intense, the show is as well. As appealing as Martha is as a person, the show's brutal business dealings do not play to her more genteel image or audience, and she does not play to the Apprentice's. In a program where a contentious, battle-royale "boardroom" is the main draw, Martha's quieter approach might be the defining difference that turns off Apprentice fans and dooms her rendition.

Martha's Apprentice is not as good as Trump's, but it mainly pales in comparison. Despite some negatives, there's enough of Apprentice left to keep this fan watching. Besides, I've always been hot for Martha. Unfortunately for NBC, I may be a minority on both counts.

* That's a paraphrase.

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