Today (Wednesday, April 28) was SaddamHussein's birthday. Not coincidentally it was also Jay Leno'sbirthday. Nuff said? Okay, consider this: Saddam: Achieved his position through backstabbing, betrayal and murder. Jay: Achieved his position through backstabbing and betrayal. (And, come on, have you seen Johnny lately? Yeah, thought not.) Saddam: Used ruthless underlings to crush dissidents. Jay: Used ruthless underling (Helen Kushnick) ...

    Forget Frodo! Forget Spock! Forget DarthVader! *   SmartAz Lives!!!     After weeks ofmortal combat with the Realtor from Hell I am now safely ensconced inmy new hovel -- a whole 7 blocks from my old shack. Things are almoststabilized and as back to normal as they're likely to get for thetime being.     I'll soon be backhere blogging regularly. Start cutting your palm fronds now for mytriumphal return. (Strike that -- ...

The Lent Thing Rages On     At TacoBell Thursday night I noticed they are pushing items for Lent:quesadillas, wraps of various types, etc. I've never seen "the Bell"pushing Lent before. For the past couple years McDonald's and Burger King placed theirrespective fish sandwiches on special. Whether they're trying to pickup Lenten business or just make themselves look more acceptable sothey don't get "given up" for 40 days I don't know. What I personallyfind interesti...

The Lent Thing Rages On     At TacoBell Thursday night I noticed they are pushing items for Lent:quesadillas, wraps of various types, etc. I've never seen "the Bell"pushing Lent before. For the past couple years McDonald's and Burger King placed theirrespective fish sandwiches on special. Whether they're trying to pickup Lenten business or just make themselves look more acceptable sothey don't get "given up" for 40 days I don't know. What I personallyfind interesti...

    Ah, dating actresses. Let's say you go through a particularly messy or painful breakup; we've all been there. You think you'll watch one of your favorite TV shows. Maybe you can relax, get your mind off things. *POW* There she is, playing one of the lead actress's friends for an episode. It's like getting sucker punched. Rather than relaxation you get the pain dredged up all over again, like broken glass at the bottom of your margarita. Blend that , Jimmy Buffet. &nbs...

Have you seen the RedBull commercial with St. Peter pacing in front of the pearly gates? He'saggravated that while he used to decide whom should receivewings, now everyone is getting wings by drinking RedBull. Mostfrustrating. It never occurred to me before, but the traditional view of St.Peter pits him as nothing more than a glorified (no pun intended)doorman! That's what should be frustrating. I can see the dayGod handed out the assignments. Peter anxiously opens his envelope,then hi...

Have you seen the RedBull commercial with St. Peter pacing in front of the pearly gates? He'saggravated that while he used to decide whom should receivewings, now everyone is getting wings by drinking RedBull. Mostfrustrating. It never occurred to me before, but the traditional view of St.Peter pits him as nothing more than a glorified (no pun intended)doorman! That's what should be frustrating. I can see the dayGod handed out the assignments. Peter anxiously opens his envelope,then hi...

    I thought I was satisfied with my JoeUserexperience. I was content with my place in the world, hovering aroundthe 250s. I thought it was an accomplishment only being here a coupleweeks and already being at that user rank. Then I wrote my article on TrollAttacks and was propelled into the 150s. Still happy. Still in myown little "user rank" world. I even took to checking in every day tosee how I was doing,. The ranks of other users never entered my mind.   &n...

    They (claim to have) sold the house out fromunder me. (Clickhere for the story up to now.) Did the Realtor Witch throw a fit because I wasn't here to let her in as she demanded? Did they finally decide they couldn't sell the house while I was in it? Did they realize the house needs a hell of a lot of work before they could even begin to get the price they hoped for? Get me out, fix it up, sell it later? ...

    What do you do with a self centered, selfinterested, and totally self motivated real estate agent who isscrewing her client, her customer (me), and ultimately herself?     I'm trying to buy this house I'm livingin. It's been on the market for more than 2 years. The real estatecompany decided it would be a good idea to rent it out so the ownerwouldn't hemorrhage so much money. (I'm beginning to think that wasnot their motivation, though). In real...

    You may have heard earlier this week howthe FDAhas delayed approval of selling a "morning after"/"abortion" pillover-the-counter (OTC).     Earlier tonight I wrote an impassioned treatise on whythis pill should never be sold over-the-counter. Then I crossed myRubicon. I went to news.google.com in search of some good links for my article. As I read the articlesconcerning the delay and read what this pill really is I foundI had been mislead by th...

    In case you didn't know it, according tothe JoeUserpoint system you can lose points when any other registered userclicks that they think you're being a troll.     Unfortunately, this can have direconsequences in the hands of malicious users. For instance, Muggaz recently lostover 800 (!!!) points in about 3 hours, apparently to asingle malicious user (or malicious user and group of friends) whoactively decided to kick him out of thetop 10. In...

    (Whoops, this one should have been posted2 weeks ago. Sorry about that. It may be too late to pull off now,but you're good to go for next year....)     There exist some dumb little indicators thatdon't make much sense but turn out to be shockingly accurate anyway,such as my adviceon how to pick the Rose Bowl winner (the team with the bestlooking cheerleaders usually wins). This also falls under thatcategory. They don't make much sense, but they w...